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DVD Reviews

a lascivious review of

Alluring Cumback

by Your Bearded Confidant
(a.k.a. ThatGuyYouLike)

With over two hours of hardcore action and no fewer than 20 dazzling cute and sexy young men, there's not room here to adequately describe every luscious detail. But we'll try to give a good sense of what you can expect from this sizzling, not-to-be-missed masterpiece.

First off, the guys are utterly adorable. We're talking drop-dead gorgeous from head to toe. They're young but not quite baby-faced twinks. They're old enough to have spent some quality time in the gym, so expect slender but well-toned physiques. The guys are all smooth, but check out the sexy treasure trails on Robbie Masters and several of his buddies. Need we say that the guys are well-hung? They are, indeed! And they're uncut. (Lovers of uncut dicks, don't miss the hot foreskin nibbling 52 minutes into the film.)

That brings us to the cumshots. You're in for a treat: very juicy, far shooting, and plentiful! There are some truly spectacular nut bustings here, well-worth instant replays. The guys shoot off all over themselves and each other, and it's simply beautiful to behold. Oftentimes, the guys shoot off more than once per session. When a guy gets creamed on (such as 47 minutes into the film, to name but one example), he uses his buddy's jizz as lube to trigger his own orgasm. It's mega-hot.

Condoms do get used during the anal scenes, but you'll still see some asses glazed in hot cream. Cum lovers won't want to miss the circle jerk extravaganza during the last five minutes of the film. The guys pump their thick white loads onto shiny silver platters. Wait till you see each guy adding his cream to mix with his buddy's. It's no doubt the best circle jerk ever recorded (among those not involving cum eating).

The action runs the gamut from sultry duos to wild threesomes to even wilder orgies (with nine men). Romantic types will love all the tender deep kissing, body worship, frottage, ear nibbling, and other foreplay. Playful types will get a kick out of the horny rascals who make out in a rougher, more sportive fashion. Dick lovers will be in heaven over the luscious cocksucking, deep-throating, facefucking, and 69ing.

Spit is the only lube these guys use. Ass men will no doubt adore the extra juicy rimming of the spectacular butts on display. The guys' asses are naturally furry, and the rimmers use lots and lots of spit for lube as they tongue and finger fuck those tight holes. The buttfucking is spectacular, by the way. These guys aren't just pretty faces — they know how to ram those cocks like jackhammers and how to take them all the way to the hilt.

You won't believe some the positions these guys try. For example, at the 65 minute mark, you'll see the bottom man practically in a headstand on the bed, his top buddy standing over him (fat dick plunging straight down into the fuckhole) and hopping wildly up and down on the mattress. Less wild but equally hot is the chain fucking at the 104 minute mark. In addition to the hardcore action, there is a highly erotic solo shower scene as well as some hot modeling and posing.

The only downside to the film is the voiceover moaning and groaning. The sounds don't match the guys' mouths, and it can be distracting. But that's easily remedied: just turn down the volume. There's enough eye candy to make up for the lost sound.

a lascivious review of


by Your Bearded Confidant
(a.k.a. ThatGuyYouLike)

This quick, no-nonsense film is a modest presentation of solo, duo, and trio action, with an emphasis on the sticky sperm that horny amateur studs tend to pump in large quantities. This is mansex in the tradition of classic gay porn — the guys are masculine, ruggedly handsome, and total sex maniacs. Two of the seven men have hairy chests, several sport goatees, and all are nicely hung and in great shape.

Note that the scenes were filmed in 1999 and 2001, so the video quality is fair to good as opposed to the excellent pictures of new films shot digitally. Also note that while cum eating is featured, the men butt fuck with condoms.

The duo action features 69ing, rimming, face fucking, hard buttfucking, some amazingly hot dick-to-dick frottage, open-mouth cumshots, and snowballing. The trio action (which constitutes the bulk of the film) features some deep-throating, lots and lots of tit play (pinching, biting, and sucking), and some brutal, relentless buttfucking and chain fucking that will delight lovers of rough sex. The guys pound one another until they're drenched in sweat, physically exhausted, totally drained, and licking jizz off their lips.

Unfortunately, in order to see this one-hour film you have to sit through three full minutes of warnings and cautions and notices. Three minutes equals five percent of the film's entire running time! You can't fast forward or skip these messages. It's standard for a film to contain messages at the beginning, but to make them last for three entire minutes is a serious disservice to the viewer. So here's a warning of my own: if you buy this DVD, be aware that five percent of it disables your remote control and contains no erotic content.

a full-frontal review of

Raw Tools

by Your Bearded Confidant
(a.k.a. ThatGuyYouLike)

This all-bareback film is a real treat, loaded with massive uncut dicks, hard fucking, big-squirting orgasms, sticky facials, and cum swallowing. A dozen handsome young Czech studs treat us to nonstop, hardcore action. If you're into hot European guys and raw sex, you're in for 111 minutes of sheer pleasure. This is the sort of high-quality, high-intensity action that sets its own standard and will no doubt spoil you — but in such a good way!

Lovers of perfectly built bodies and natural body hair will be in heaven. Sure, there are plenty of smooth guys on display, but the occasional sexy treasure trails, furry bellies, wisps of chest hair, and hairy asses will definitely please admirers of manfur.

Things start off fast and furious, with two young factory workers taking turns sucking on a buddy's dick. The guys get hornier by the minute and suck and fuck in a variety of positions. The two brunets finally jack their loads all over the blond guy's furry belly, triggering his own sticky eruption. This is the first of two hot threesomes in the film.

Meanwhile, the tall, dark, and handsome factory foreman is enjoying a sensual blowjob and rim job by his eager protégé (a smaller-framed blond cutie). But the foreman is not out to abuse his power — he lets his employee fuck him up the ass. And what a rapid-fire fucking he gets! That intense prostate massage has the foreman squirting a very juicy cumload. But he's still horny, so he opens wide to eat his employee's mega-squirting orgasm. By the time he catches the jizz in his mouth, his naked skin is drenched in sperm. It's a fantastic conclusion to a hot session.

Many of the scenes feature a bigger guy with a shorter buddy, so viewers into size differences will have a field day. Lovers of rough fucking will also be in heaven. These guys don't hold back when they pound butt, and you'll see some ass muscles literally quivering from the assault of those long, thick shafts (for example, see the glorious fucking at the one hour, seven minute mark).

Though some asses do get plastered with mancream, jizz is most likely to get aimed at an open mouth. All in all, this is another winner from US Male, with crystal clear photography, marvelous close-ups, great looking guys, and ultra-hot action.

an uncensored review of

Swift Action

by Your Bearded Confidant
(a.k.a. ThatGuyYouLike)

Imagine nine athletic young Czech studs having the hardest, hottest, sweatiest summer of their lives. That's what Swift Action is all about — and what a wildly erotic summer it is! These smooth, adorable boys have constant (almost painfully rigid) hardons, desperately hungry mouths, and even more ravenous asses. They waste no time in putting everything to very good use, relishing every moment of their vacation. With boys this horny, you can expect multiple oral cumshots and snowballing in every scene.

We first join the guys in the bedroom for a beautiful threeway. After some luscious oral action (including daisy chain sucking) and tit play, the guys can't wait to feed each other hot jizz. With mouths wide open and tongues wagging, the sperm gets aimed straight down the throat. Any cum left on the lips gets snowballed afterwards. But the guys are just getting warmed up. It's now time to eat some ass and buttfuck like wild animals. Lovers of jackhammer-style fucking won't want to miss this relentless anal assault. Again, no cum goes untasted, and the top man savors the flavor after he fills his buddy's mouth. That sends the bottom boy over the edge, and he switches places to slather his buddy's tongue with fresh cream.

Meanwhile, two boys are sharing a shower, enjoying the sight of each other's throbbing bulges through their wet underwear. Just as things are getting truly steamy, we make a surprise cut to the kitchen counter top, where the guys (now completely dry) are sucking each other. Strange editing aside, we're treated to some gorgeous sucking of a fantastic cock with a sculpted mushroom head. The kitchen is a great location for these guys, because they feast on each other's bodies like true connoisseurs. They eat dick, lick ass, milk cock, and then fuck like there's no tomorrow. When they shoot off, it's right onto each other's tongues.

Another duo is taking place in an attic bedroom, with gobs more tit sucking, cock sucking, rimming, and butt fucking in a variety of positions. These guys don't aim for the mouth, but the cumshot is even better: one guy licks their combined jizz off the other's sticky torso and then snowballs it.

There's yet more action (and juicier cumshots) to go, but this will give you an idea of what to expect in this beautifully shot, highly exciting film.

an uncensored review of

The School for Lovers

by Your Bearded Confidant
(a.k.a. ThatGuyYouLike)

Too often, buying a porn film is risky because you can't be certain of the quality. Well, there's absolutely no risk when it comes to Lucas Kazan's The School For Lovers. This is a lush, beautiful film, artistically shot, starring some truly dazzling hunks. Filmed on location in southern Italy, the scenery is utterly breathtaking, as are the men. These men are like Mediterranean gods — perfectly chiseled, oozing with powerful masculinity. A lot of love went into the making of this film, and it shows in every single frame. Kazan whisks us away to gorgeous Italian villas and countrysides like something out of a dream. The exquisite scenery might almost detract from the men, if the men weren't so drop-dead handsome themselves. This is a film that respects the viewer and offers much, much more than it has to. If you've earned yourself a true visual feast, with achingly passionate mansex, then don't miss this one!

The story involves two young vacationing couples and one indecent proposal. Bearded and hairy chested super-stud Jean Franko conducts a wine tasting on the patio of his stunning villa. As he pours the wine, he tells his visitors that no one can expect fidelity in men. He bets that he can prove that their lovers are incapable of being faithful, like every other man. The visitors take him up on his bet, swearing that they'll do everything he tells them to do. What transpires is an afternoon of irresistible temptations and unbridled sexual adventures.

We're treated to lots of sun-kissed outdoor sex, some taking place poolside and some within the scenic countryside. While the scenery is romantic, the sex is powerful and rough. For example, when Franko admires an ass, he slaps it and squeezes it and stretches it with both of his strong hands. When he rims, it's full-on buttfucking with his tongue. When he wants to get sucked, he beats his bottom man's face with his enormous, uncut hardon, grabs him by the hair, and forcefully plunges down his throat. It's not violent sex, but it's as butch as it gets. How hot is it? You'll see a man cum just from getting his face assaulted by Franko's dick!

With such ultra-sexed studs, one big squirting orgasm just gets things lubed up for the next round. Needless to say, the sweat-drenched buttfucking is as intense as the oral assaults. To see these men fuck is almost like seeing mansex for the first time — they bring such artistry to lovemaking. If you're into male bonding on the more tender side, don't miss the fantastic dick sparring 47 minutes into the film. And lovers of sensual handjobs will be in heaven over the scene that follows.

Franko turns out to be right — when tempted, the men at his villa are unable to remain faithful to their boyfriends. But Franko has a marvelous surprise in store for all the guys. I won't give away the extended finale, but it's a truly wonderful and totally unexpected conclusion to the story.

Luckily, there's more to see after we finish the film. A behind-the-scenes featurette invites us to bask in this fantasy world one more time.