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Why You Can Forget Him After You Fuck Him

 tags: Anal Sex, Ejaculation, Oral Sex, Red Hot Gray Areas

Romance is beautiful, but the hard truth is that once a man swallows your cum or takes it up his raw ass, you don't have to see or communicate with him again if you don't wish.  That's because you have already given him everything — your fucking DNA, your entire being.  He is entitled to nothing more from you unless you choose otherwise.

The Gayest, Most Forbidden Egyptian Symbols

 tags: Red Hot Gray Areas

There are still places in the world where not only is modern gay culture unlawful, but age-old gaiety is also suppressed.  Egyptologists are a conservative bunch who have deliberately hidden the gayest, most deviant symbols of ancient Egypt by virtue of their startlingly explicit nature.  The symbols showcased in the controversial Forbidden Hieroglyphs are all genuine, and their meanings, while shocking, are instantly decipherable to modern-day gays.  It would seem that the more history has passed, the more homosexuals want the same things.  Finally, gays can do away with the 26 letters of the English alphabet and embrace a wholly queer language with 66 characters.  (Or, at least, they can use these forbidden symbols for tattooing and sex magick ideas.)  FYI, used copies of this book are going for $59, but Amazon currently has a new copy for $8.00.

Here's a random page from the book:

(The text reads, "The eyes of a hawk miss nothing, especially when it comes to crotch bulges.  An older meaning of this hieroglyph was hawking, as in selling, goods -- in other words, a hustler who offered his cock for money.")

An Insight Into Gay Sex-Magick

 tags: Red Hot Gray Areas

Here's how thinking about jizz, piss, and spit can help you better understand one of the cryptic maxims of gay sex-magick, "As above, so below." Let's start with the "below" part of the maxim, referring to dirty, animalistic gay sex. Spraying a man with semen is filthy, pissing all over him is filthier, and spitting on him is filthiest. Note how the fluids get filthier the higher up on the body they originate. The balls are the lowest organs, but their jizz isn't as degrading as piss, which comes from the bladder above, because jizz is accompanied by the bliss of orgasm, while piss is accompanied by the lesser pleasure of bladder pressure relief. Spit is the most contemptuous of the fluids because the spitter does not derive physical pleasure from the act. From the spiritual perspective, the body fluids get less degrading the higher up on the body they originate. Hence, kissing (saliva) is the most chaste form of physical affection while fucking (semen) is the lowest (and urine remains in the middle). And so the meaning of "as above, so below" becomes clear. Spit is the ultimate in base carnality, even though it's highest up in terms of bodily "chakras" (energy centers), even as salivary kissing is the ultimate expression of enlightened love. The heavenly bliss of orgasm is accompanied by ejaculated semen from down low. The lowest is the highest and the highest is the lowest as a man's body fluids dissolve duality into a red-hot gray area.

The Controversial "Gay Sex" Hardcore Diet

 tags: Red Hot Gray Areas

The latest hardcore gay sex diet originated in - you guessed it - Japan, birthplace of the kinkiest kinks.  On this diet, you ingest only what nourishment can be derived from your fellow man, which means that you devour only cum, spit, and piss, with no limits on how much you swallow in a day.  Yes, the diet is the ultimate celebration of mansex, and yes, you do lose weight quickly, but no, it's not safe sex and, as with most all diet fads, it's not nutritionally sound.  While we love the idea of the gay sex hardcore diet, we can't in good conscience recommend it.

Just How Gay Can a Non-Porno Get?

 tags: Hairy Men, Here's What It Looks Like, Red Hot Gray Areas

The over-the-top homoeroticism in the classic comedy Sailor Beware verges on unbelievable. Before we get to the multiple hairy-chest rubs, consider:

In the opening moments of the film, the very first appearance of Jerry Lewis has him spraying the back of his throat repeatedly, next to a poster that says "The NAVY builds MEN":

Jerry's character is allergic to women, you see. He explains:" I can't even get close to a girl -- I'm allergic to face powder, perfume and lipstick. If I get too close to a girl, my uvula becomes edematous, which means inflamed, and if it becomes inflamed it swells up and I can't breathe. And if I can't breathe, that could become fatal." And since he can't kiss girls for his very life, he propositions Dean Martin in the first scene: "You want I should change places with her?"

Jerry's gay adventures in the Navy find him on all fours before two officers with billy clubs, one club pointing at his ass and the other at his mouth:

And he manages to get himself chained to a torpedo (gee, I wonder what all this phallic symbolism is supposed to mean?)

During an extended section of the film in which lots of hairy-chested men are shirtless (justified by new recruits' medical exams), Jerry is poked and penetrated by ever-larger needles (and forgive us for interpreting this as symbolic of getting fucked by ever-larger cocks):

In case we missed the penetration symbolism of the needles, a soldier enters with a giant drill; Jerry passes out, and the soldier exclaims, "I never touched him." Yes, Jerry is getting repeatedly drilled by enormous tools in the Navy.

One doctor spends so much time on Jerry's chest that Jerry asks, "Lose something?"

There's a famous euphemism that Mae West used: "Come up and see me sometime." It meant, of course, "My bedroom is open to you, so let's fuck whenever you want." Jerry says, "Come up and see us sometime" to an officer:

Oh yeah, those hairy chest rubs. One doctor ditches his stethoscope to check Jerry's heartbeat by hand, but this is merely the beginning:

We counted no fewer than 17 (seventeen) circular rubs of Jerry's chest hair in this boxing scene:

And those rubs follow an earlier tit massage:

In addition to dry chest rubs, there are wet ones:

We didn't even ask why Jerry rests his head against his boxing opponent's penis:

Romantic moments like these speak for themselves:

Did we forget Jerry grasping a periscope and opening wide?

Jerry's superior officer hates him, but there are gay subtexts about him, too. Here he explains that the chief of the recruiting station and he are "as close as that":

The officer tries to keep Jerry from being enlisted, but the clerks assume Jerry is the officer's toy boy: "The weird one's a friend of the chief," says one clerk to the other, who responds, "Wouldn't you know."

They're not so wrong, because Jerry did spray the officer's chest:

One more chest rub:

And let's leave with Jerry as he flees for his life from every woman in the world: