What's missing from this photo? Here's the "before" . . . Click on the image to reveal the "after."
Instead of "jobs" maybe think of handies and blowies as "opportunities?"
—the opportunistic Michael Ian Black
Has it got to that stage where you'd pump just about anything?
—the pump-worthy Scottish comedian Iain Connell
I feel like I'm getting to the age where if I was ever sent to prison I would barely be raped.
Phone your da and tell him he'll need to take you to casualty cos the Viagra isn't wearing off and you've got a christening in the morning.
—the ever-hard Scottish comedian Iain Connell