Do I need to worry about ghosts putting their dicks in my food?
—the inquisitive Rob Huebel
Masturbating because its 12pm to 3am somewhere.
—the preoccupied Dan Guterman
Please, Whole Foods don't fire me as your self appointed men's bathroom monitor just because I got stuck in 1 little glory hole!
—the massively-endowed Rob Huebel
When people ask if I'm a real fireman, I just point out the burning car we're fucking in.
—the smoldering Rob Huebel