I don't have a nickname for my penis. I just use his Christian name.
Just want to take a moment to thank everybody who has ever put their mouth on my penis.
—the grateful Michael Ian Black
tags: ReM/Mixed Erotica
ReM/Mixed Erotica: At the Cinema
There once was a boy bold as thunder
Whose hand I encountered Down Under.
He'd caress perineum
Five showings per diem,
Till people around us would wonder.
This Aussie, of background so Perth,
Of climaxes suffered no dearth.
While we sat in the Odeon,
Made him flow forth like a firth.
I don't use sex dolls; I use sex action figures.
It doesn't matter which side you use to jerk off, if you're a lefty or a righty, you're still only masturbating.
—Keating Thomas, who has to use two hands anyway