“Striving for Perfection”
Dear Bearded Confidant,
Can you help me to solve a problem? I am a 18 y/o and I have always known that I like men. I have never had any experience with a man but I always think about them. One problem I found recently is that I seem to have a high expectation for the man I am looking for. I find myself only turned on by pornstars or very masculine looking hunks. I wonder if this will prevent me from getting sex because obviously not many of these nice guys are out there and certainly not many of them are gay. All I am interested in is having a first time experience, but if guys are not good enough, it will make me feel disgusted. Can you tell me my problem or how on earth should I approach or find one of those guys?
You are not alone in being attracted to specimens of masculine perfection. However, as you say, there aren't very many perfect men out there, so you will most likely die a virgin. If imperfect men disgust you, then you should simply enjoy jerking yourself off to pictures of pornstars. If you ever want to feel another man's warm flesh against yours, you will have to accept his imperfections and find a way to see his inner beauty. For more observations about high expectations, see my archive on "Attracting the Perfect Man."