“Jealousy During a Three-way”
Dear Bearded Confidant,
My partner and I have been together for a year and a half. He wants to have threesomes, but both of us are too jealous. He wants to restrict what I do during threesomes, yet he can do everything. What can I do in order to prevent getting jealous and angry at him while he has sex with someone else? Should I go along with this or get the hell out of this relationship?
While threesomes seem like a good idea for spicing up and adding variety to your sex life, they tend to create more complications and tensions than they're worth. Nobody likes to be the odd man out, especially when it's your own partner who's getting it on like gangbusters with somebody else and neither of them seems to remember that you're in the room. The safest sort of threesome is having a buddy over who enjoys jacking off as he watches you and your partner fuck. The buddy gets a live sex show (or "full motion smut" as some people call it), and you get the exhibitionistic thrill of performing for an audience and knowing that he's getting off to your fuck show. But once a third party starts getting between you and your partner physically, he's likely to cause an emotional rift based on jealousy. To complicate matters further, it sounds as though your partner has a double set of standards for threesomes: one set for you (restrictions on what is appropriate), and a different set for him (anything goes). You definitely deserve better than that. Why not confront your partner about this issue in a gentle way? Without becoming emotional, let him know how the situation makes you feel. If he cares about your feelings, he'll work with you to correct this problem. If not, then you might as well know for certain that this road is a dead end and go ahead and take your exit now. There are no three ways about it!