Dear Bearded Confidant,

I ride my bicycle around my town during the day when it is pretty much deserted. I always go by this house where the man is outside mowing his lawn with only his jogging shorts on - his body is buffed and his cock stands out of his shorts.  I want to ride up to him and ask him if I can see his rod and maybe jack him off and suck his prick - is this too daring?  I cream in my thong when I approach him.

Dear Hot and Hard,

If you ride up to this man and ask to see his rod, one of two things is likely to happen: 1) he'll whip it out for you and push you to your knees, or 2) you'll get punched in the face.  If these odds sound good to you, then go for it.  However, I would suggest going up to the man and, without obviously looking at his crotch, asking him if he could use any part-time yard work assistance.  If he goes for your offer, you'll be able to spend some sweaty shirtless time with him which might lead to him inviting you in for a glass of iced tea or cold beer.  And after that, anything might happen.  But you'll definitely get farther if you play it cool and watch for subtle clues that this man might not mind getting off with a buddy.